Comments on: Hum Drum Days http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html Tons of feathery layers. Sat, 30 Aug 2008 02:34:45 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.3 By: Amber http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-356 Amber Sat, 22 Jul 2006 22:10:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-356 Ahh my dear, this is something I have struggled with and will continue to struggle with. I had a great career that I loved and never intended to stay at home. Until I got married and really had a vision for how important it is to be at home.<BR/><BR/>Honestly, once things start connecting for you in Philedelphia, life will be so much easier. I was so blessed to get into a mom's hiking group (my passion) shortly after Haddie was born and it has been my sanity. Keep plugging away and you will find women in your same situation who share your same hobbies.<BR/><BR/>Isolation and motherhood do NOT go together and I totally relate to what you're going through. You are doing a great job; your love and concern is evident! Ahh my dear, this is something I have struggled with and will continue to struggle with. I had a great career that I loved and never intended to stay at home. Until I got married and really had a vision for how important it is to be at home.

Honestly, once things start connecting for you in Philedelphia, life will be so much easier. I was so blessed to get into a mom’s hiking group (my passion) shortly after Haddie was born and it has been my sanity. Keep plugging away and you will find women in your same situation who share your same hobbies.

Isolation and motherhood do NOT go together and I totally relate to what you’re going through. You are doing a great job; your love and concern is evident!

]]> By: txmommy http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-357 txmommy Sat, 22 Jul 2006 14:04:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-357 yep, welcome to the club!<BR/>You'll do great, you have the most important part down already: you care! yep, welcome to the club!
You’ll do great, you have the most important part down already: you care!

]]> By: Shannon http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-358 Shannon Sat, 22 Jul 2006 13:44:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-358 You took the words right from my mouth. <BR/><BR/>I never thought I was going to be a mom, so pushed it aside and started my other baby (my business). And now I have twin girls. <BR/><BR/>I don't want to let go of my first baby so trying to balance it all is nervewracking at times.<BR/><BR/>Yup, I screw up, but nothing major. And I am sure you are the same. <BR/><BR/>I think Sam is so fortunate to have a great mom. You took the words right from my mouth.

I never thought I was going to be a mom, so pushed it aside and started my other baby (my business). And now I have twin girls.

I don’t want to let go of my first baby so trying to balance it all is nervewracking at times.

Yup, I screw up, but nothing major. And I am sure you are the same.

I think Sam is so fortunate to have a great mom.

]]> By: janice http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-359 janice Fri, 21 Jul 2006 23:48:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-359 oh girl - i know what you are saying!! I just read all the comments to see what the other ladies said too. some great encouragement and advice there.<BR/><BR/>I get bored SO QUICKLY when I am doing the at home days. It drives me crazy. I am so blessed to have my twin nearby. Also, my twin lives in a townhouse complex and has gotten to know two other moms with young babies, so they all keep each other from going nuts with the baby boredom and the loneliness. <BR/><BR/>Just remember that you are an awesome mom and you need to give yourself a BREAK!! listen to the other ladies and put away those books and try to stop analyzing everything so much. (I am a worrier and an overanalyzer myself, so i know that is far eaier said than done.) Everything will turn out fine and soon you will be so busy driving him to and from activities and school and you will be meeting tons of other moms. oh girl - i know what you are saying!! I just read all the comments to see what the other ladies said too. some great encouragement and advice there.

I get bored SO QUICKLY when I am doing the at home days. It drives me crazy. I am so blessed to have my twin nearby. Also, my twin lives in a townhouse complex and has gotten to know two other moms with young babies, so they all keep each other from going nuts with the baby boredom and the loneliness.

Just remember that you are an awesome mom and you need to give yourself a BREAK!! listen to the other ladies and put away those books and try to stop analyzing everything so much. (I am a worrier and an overanalyzer myself, so i know that is far eaier said than done.) Everything will turn out fine and soon you will be so busy driving him to and from activities and school and you will be meeting tons of other moms.

]]> By: american girl http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-360 american girl Fri, 21 Jul 2006 15:26:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-360 I just wanted to say that you're not alone...when I moved to Ontario, Canada two years ago, I was just about the loneliest, saddest person you'd ever hope (not) to meet. I prayed every day for a real friend. The loneliness was made worse by the fact that I had just left graduate school where I had some of the best, closest relationships of my life. And to top it off, my dear husband is an introvert and not much help at all! <BR/><BR/>However, once I began getting out in the community by volunteering (I didn't have a child yet), I met two women in particular that are my lifesavers, and they came at exactly the right time, when I was newly pregnant (one was also pregnant). The timing couldn't have been better (although, 7 months is a loooong time when you're lonely). I truly believe your time will come.<BR/><BR/>Also, I've learned, as the mother of a 6 month old, that your instincts are better than all the parenting books in the world! I just wanted to say that you’re not alone…when I moved to Ontario, Canada two years ago, I was just about the loneliest, saddest person you’d ever hope (not) to meet. I prayed every day for a real friend. The loneliness was made worse by the fact that I had just left graduate school where I had some of the best, closest relationships of my life. And to top it off, my dear husband is an introvert and not much help at all!

However, once I began getting out in the community by volunteering (I didn’t have a child yet), I met two women in particular that are my lifesavers, and they came at exactly the right time, when I was newly pregnant (one was also pregnant). The timing couldn’t have been better (although, 7 months is a loooong time when you’re lonely). I truly believe your time will come.

Also, I’ve learned, as the mother of a 6 month old, that your instincts are better than all the parenting books in the world!

]]> By: GranolaGirl12 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-361 GranolaGirl12 Fri, 21 Jul 2006 14:52:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-361 I'm glad to see you've gotten some great advice and empathy so far... Here's what helps me get out of bed and go through the "routine" again:<BR/>+swimming-- we took swim lessons and joined a pool<BR/>+Baby Bookworms at the library (free! air conditioned!)<BR/>+teaching E sign language (I like learning a new skill)<BR/>+it was a huge blessing to meet moms in the neighborhood that I can walk down the street and hang out with. <BR/>Good luck! and don't forget-- you'll always have your online "play group" when you need it. You're a great mom and Sam loves/needs/adores you. I’m glad to see you’ve gotten some great advice and empathy so far… Here’s what helps me get out of bed and go through the “routine” again:
+swimming– we took swim lessons and joined a pool
+Baby Bookworms at the library (free! air conditioned!)
+teaching E sign language (I like learning a new skill)
+it was a huge blessing to meet moms in the neighborhood that I can walk down the street and hang out with.
Good luck! and don’t forget– you’ll always have your online “play group” when you need it. You’re a great mom and Sam loves/needs/adores you.

]]> By: Eli's Mom http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-362 Eli's Mom Thu, 20 Jul 2006 22:32:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-362 I feel like I could have written your blog! I NEVER wanted kids, but once I told my husband "NOW", i wanted taht baby immediatly also. ANd here I am, independant goal-oriented overachiever, staying at home, emptying the dishwasher 3 times a day and saying "babababababa" to Eli anytime he wants to engage in conversation...<BR/>My point is, I can totally relate. I make as many 'errands' as I can for us during the week, including as much time with other babies and moms as possible. Even though I never seem to connect with any of the other moms, at least it gets me a 10 minute conversation here and there.<BR/><BR/>Go back to the stroller strides....that's a good outlet. Check out story time at your library, if they offer it. <BR/><BR/>Swim lessons at the Y. They do parent/child lessons for kids 6months-2 or 3years. <BR/><BR/>Check the local hospital for any type of mom-n-me meeting/connection group. Most offer them. <BR/><BR/>Good luck!!! I feel like I could have written your blog! I NEVER wanted kids, but once I told my husband “NOW”, i wanted taht baby immediatly also. ANd here I am, independant goal-oriented overachiever, staying at home, emptying the dishwasher 3 times a day and saying “babababababa” to Eli anytime he wants to engage in conversation…
My point is, I can totally relate. I make as many ‘errands’ as I can for us during the week, including as much time with other babies and moms as possible. Even though I never seem to connect with any of the other moms, at least it gets me a 10 minute conversation here and there.

Go back to the stroller strides….that’s a good outlet. Check out story time at your library, if they offer it.

Swim lessons at the Y. They do parent/child lessons for kids 6months-2 or 3years.

Check the local hospital for any type of mom-n-me meeting/connection group. Most offer them.

Good luck!!!

]]> By: ksl http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-363 ksl Thu, 20 Jul 2006 15:00:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-363 I have heard that the definition of motherhood is wearing your heart on your sleeve and always second guessing yourself. You are the best mom Sam will ever have and you are doing a great job. No other person on earth cares about him like you do and if you took him to a daycare I bet the thought of Super Porridge or keeping him intellectually stimulated would be very far down on the to do list for the day. <BR/><BR/>I read a recent post at on http://partners-in-parenting.typepad.com that was really intresting. Hope that helps. I have heard that the definition of motherhood is wearing your heart on your sleeve and always second guessing yourself. You are the best mom Sam will ever have and you are doing a great job. No other person on earth cares about him like you do and if you took him to a daycare I bet the thought of Super Porridge or keeping him intellectually stimulated would be very far down on the to do list for the day.

I read a recent post at on http://partners-in-parenting.typepad.com that was really intresting. Hope that helps.

]]> By: Stephanie http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-364 Stephanie Thu, 20 Jul 2006 07:55:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-364 Seriously, your little boy is so lucky to have a mom that loves him enough to be so concerned about him.<BR/><BR/>Somewhere around the second birthday of my oldest, I had the thought that reiterated what Kate said. I am a good enough mom, not a perfect mom, because that lady doesn't exist. My daughter was much happier once I realized that. I started to focus on me again too. I needed to figure out for myself that I wasn't capable of taking care of another human being until my needs were taken care of. I took some classes and started some hobbies and it refreshed me to the point that I looked forward to being with my family again. <BR/><BR/>So my advice to you is this. Put all of those parenting books in a box (at least for a week) and find a really good book that you WANT to read, let him play with his blocks and cars--because independant play promotes imagination and creativity. Heck, if you entertain him ALL of the time, he will expect that when he is older and it is really sad to see a five-year-old that can't handle playing on their own. Spend some time getting to know you again. <BR/><BR/><BR/>Motherhood can be monotonous, boring, trying and can make you feel like you are suffocating. We have all been there, we all still get that way. Give yourself a reward to congratulate yourself for making it this far. I find a pedicure works wonders, and I have pretty tootsies to remember it by. You are normal to feel this way. I am more worried about the moms that DON'T feel this way.<BR/><BR/><BR/>(((HUGS))) during this trying time in your life. Seriously, your little boy is so lucky to have a mom that loves him enough to be so concerned about him.

Somewhere around the second birthday of my oldest, I had the thought that reiterated what Kate said. I am a good enough mom, not a perfect mom, because that lady doesn’t exist. My daughter was much happier once I realized that. I started to focus on me again too. I needed to figure out for myself that I wasn’t capable of taking care of another human being until my needs were taken care of. I took some classes and started some hobbies and it refreshed me to the point that I looked forward to being with my family again.

So my advice to you is this. Put all of those parenting books in a box (at least for a week) and find a really good book that you WANT to read, let him play with his blocks and cars–because independant play promotes imagination and creativity. Heck, if you entertain him ALL of the time, he will expect that when he is older and it is really sad to see a five-year-old that can’t handle playing on their own. Spend some time getting to know you again.

Motherhood can be monotonous, boring, trying and can make you feel like you are suffocating. We have all been there, we all still get that way. Give yourself a reward to congratulate yourself for making it this far. I find a pedicure works wonders, and I have pretty tootsies to remember it by. You are normal to feel this way. I am more worried about the moms that DON’T feel this way.

(((HUGS))) during this trying time in your life.

]]> By: katie http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-365 katie Thu, 20 Jul 2006 05:30:00 +0000 http://www.totalmomhaircut.com/2006/07/18/hum-drum-days.html#comment-365 I wrote a very long comment to this and then it got deleted somehow, doh! To sum it up, you aren't alone. It's minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day over here too. We are all doing are best (and I felt a huge amount of relief when I finally figured out that Jack can play in his room by himself while I am sewing/reading/having a cup of tea and I shouldn't feel guilty about not playing with him every minute!) I wrote a very long comment to this and then it got deleted somehow, doh! To sum it up, you aren’t alone. It’s minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day over here too. We are all doing are best (and I felt a huge amount of relief when I finally figured out that Jack can play in his room by himself while I am sewing/reading/having a cup of tea and I shouldn’t feel guilty about not playing with him every minute!)

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