What I love about these is that most of them are taken from very far away. I’m still experimenting with my camera, and I guess you could say that this was “Zoom Lens” day. So I like the ones of the boys together especially, because it really was just the two of them being brothers together. Hubby and I were about 100 feet away.

In the spirit of community, I’d like to get going on the theme idea I proposed to you guys a while back. In case you missed that post, what I’d like to do is put up a theme every two weeks or so. Once announced, readers can choose to respond to that theme in whatever creative form they choose - write a post in any form such as essay, poetry, fiction, etc.; post a photo; share a video; create something at home and then photograph or videotape it to share on your blog; anything else you can think of. The point here is to get the creative juices flowing again and participate in an activity where others are also exploring their own creativity in a supportive environment. What can I say? I used to be an art educator.

If you want to participate this time around (and I certainly hope you will), simply create a post in response to the theme stated below before Saturday, November 8th. You can post your response to the theme any time within the two week frame. Once you have put yours up, please email me the link to your post (not your blog, but the post itself. Just click on the title of your post before copying the link url). I will also post my own response to the theme at some point during the two weeks. Finally, within a few days after the deadline for posts, I’ll compile the list and link to all of the posts here at Total Mom Haircut so that everyone can go around and see what others did. Sound good? If you have any questions or I haven’t covered something please let me know.

Also, if you have an idea for a theme, please email me. I’ll put it on the list I have going. So far I am focusing on one-word themes that could have multiple interpretations. And if you have an idea for a name for this little exercise, please, do share.

And for this first one? In celebration of the kick-off of this fun, creative experiment, the theme for round one is: Exploration.

Also, I have a new post up at The Imperfect Parent. Someone made me mad. And you know how I get - you know, obnoxious. And it’s a shame too, because I really wanted to support the purpose behind what this woman was saying, but her tone was just too distracting.

You know, there’s nothing like going and talking about blogging ALL DAY to really make you prioritize and evaluate your blogging goals. Blogher DC is something I really needed, but not for the reasons I would have expected. I learned a lot about tools, sites, ways of driving traffic, etc., but I wouldn’t say that’s the most important thing that I came away with.

Listening to people talk about how to get more readers and how to make my blog bigger really made me rethink my personal blogging goals. I remembered why I started blogging in the first place, and that was because I wanted to find a community of other moms. I didn’t know many women who had children, who understood what I was going through as a new mom, and on the internet I found many. I went from feeling totally isolated to feeling like I had a support system, without actually ever “meeting” anyone. Three years later, that’s still the most important thing to me.

It’s hard to remember that sometimes. There’s a lot of pressure to keep up, because blogging is fast and furious right now. There are new social networking sites that are addicting and constant, and there are always blogs that explode with readership to make us little guys feel obsolete.

But we’re not. I love my blogging community. I love my readers and I love your blogs. I LOVE that I feel I know the people who come here, that it is not just a passing interaction. It’s not about stats. It’s really not. I already feel backed-up when I know that I haven’t made it around to your blogs in a while, and it’s because I feel that commenting is very much a give and take. Personally, I want to feel it is all manageable.

The general consensus that I got from the conference is that the very best way to get readers and build your blog has not changed from when I started a few years ago - be a “Good Blog Citizen.” Get out there and read blogs. Check out the blogrolls of those you already enjoy. Leave comments, thoughtful comments that show you are listening and thinking about what the blogger is saying. Respond to the comments you receive either through email or leaving a comment yourself. Keep up the communication and keep up the good content on your blog.

It’s perfect, really. The more involved you are, the more involved you will become. By supporting each other, we also support and promote ourselves - it’s a win-win.

I, for one, have no intention of utilizing many of the tools discussed. I like the old school way that I just described because that is what keeps me tied to the reason I love blogging. I have no interest in researching the most effective tag terms to drive more readers to me through search engines. I’m not going to Twitter. (And if you do these things please know I think that’s great - but for me, I already feel behind. More is just not an option because I may explode.)

What I am going to do is focus more on being a better reader, a better commenter. I’m always just a little behind when it comes to responding, but I’m always going to press on and get there eventually. I try very hard to respond in some way to every person that comments here, either by commenting on their site or replying in an email. And I love it when those email responses end up going back and forth several times in discussion. That’s what it’s all about.

One tool I do want to point out just in case some aren’t aware of them are sites like Kirtsy and Stumble Upon. I know you all probably know what they are, but you may not use them and/or understand how easy and helpful it is. When you’re looking at a post that has little buttons at the bottom for some of these sites, it means you’re looking at a blog where the writer has a vested interest in their blog and their writing. If you like what you read, clicking on one of those buttons (and leaving a comment, of course) is a great way to let the writer know you appreciate their work. And maybe it will help them out by driving a few more readers to their site. And if you want to add these buttons to your own site, I recommend the Share This, because it includes ALL of the sites in one cute little button, allowing your readers to choose the one they happen to use.

I put a few buttons on my blog a while ago, but had never actually Kirtsied or Stumbled anyone else, which is just kind of silly. I mean, if I would appreciate people doing it for me, of course I should share the love by doing it for them. Again, being supportive of others is the best way to promote our community in general, which benefits all of us.

So I’m actively going to start doing this for the bloggers I love when I see a great post. There’s no reason not to. It just takes a moment. For those of you who have never tried, all you have to do is set up a username for the site of your choice - the general consensus at BlogHer was that Stumble Upon is good. I personally am going to use Kirtsy because it just seems more prevalent among the blogs I read, and on their site the Family & Parenting section is featured much more. - Once you’ve set up your account you stay logged in and when you come to a post you like, you click the button the blogger has set up, then you’ll be redirected to a page where you can type in a few things about the post so that readers of Kirtsy or whatever will know what the post is, and that’s it. I Kirtsied my very first post today, and it felt really good to share the love. And it was oh-so-easy. The more people that Kirtsy the post, the more likely it is that more people will find it.

I encourage you all to participate in this wonderful thing we have going on here. Trust me, the more you give, the more you get out of blogging. So happy reading, happy writing.

I’m sure most of you know about Silicon Valley Moms Blog and all of their wonderful sister sites, including DC Metro Moms and my personal favorite, Chicago Moms Blog. Well now I’m so happy to say that there is a brand new Philadelphia Moms Blog joining the ranks. It’s just in the beginning stages, but writers are gathering and posts are loading. The official launch won’t be for a few weeks, but the site is up and running so please go check it out. My first post, wherein I advise you moms on how to get yourselves a sick day (*wink), is right here, A Stay-At-Home Mom’s Guide to Procuring Sick Days. Please go say hi.

And if you’re in the Philadelphia area (and the “area” is defined pretty loosely) and are interested in writing on the blog, now is the time to get in on it. Go to the Philadelphia Moms Blog site and read the top post, “Coming Soon,” to find out how to apply.

I so wish I had some audio to accompany this.

“Her hair grew long and knotty, turning gray and full of burrs. Her nails grew sharp, extending inches from the tips of her fingers. She became emaciated, a skeleton of herself in a long, black dress. La Llorona.”

“At night she walks the arroyos, looking for her two drowned sons, crying and wailing for them. If you go near the river at night, she will reach out and grab you, drowning you just like her sons drowned.”

This was the story my baby sitter told me when I was in fourth grade and lived in New Mexico. It scared the hell out of me. After telling me how La Llorona’s children drowned in the river and what happened to her as a result of their death, my babysitter went on to tell tale after tale of La Llorona going from house to house, knocking on the bedroom windows of children three times, and those children who were not lucky enough to get out of the room before she came in would be found lost from their beds in the morning with three knock marks printed in blood on their walls, having, I assume, been ripped to shreds by La Llorona’s terrifying nails. I didn’t sleep for months.

Ever since my evil babysitter told me these stories, La Llorona is what I think of whenever anyone so much as mentions the word ghost. Through research I have learned that there is much more to the story and it does have its roots in Spanish and Mexican history. But a few details remain constant when it comes to the story that is passed now through oral tradition. La Llorona had two sons who died in the river - how and why they drowned varies depending on your source. After their deaths La Llorona changed, transformed somehow - some would say the hauntings began after her death, I fully believed this was a woman who was still alive but had sort of “lost it,” if you will. Sometimes she’s said to be in a black dress, sometimes it’s white. Whether or not her transformation then caused her to walk the streets or the arroyos at night as a ghost, crying for her children (La Llorona is “Crying/Weeping Woman”) or if she indeed snatched naughty children from their beds at night or from the sides of the river - that varies depending on who you’re talking to.

I remember every detail of what my sitter told me. And I think what terrified me the most, what made La Llorona’s existence so plausible for me back then, was that it made so much sense to me. The story terrifies me today for the very same reason, but my empathy is in a different place.

La Llorona lost her children. Her boys, they drowned.

If my - and I’ll go there for just a moment, just long enough to write this paragraph as quickly as possible and be done with it - if anything happened to them . . . if I couldn’t smell Robby’s head sweat each morning, if I couldn’t hear Sam sing a made-up song each day, or hug them every hour, or watch them sleep at night . . . I think I’d just crawl somewhere and lay down. I don’t know if I’d cry, because it seems that crying would take energy, and I can’t imagine I’d have any, but I really can’t say for sure. Weeping might be a more appropriate term. Moaning? And I don’t know how long I’d stay there, laying under a big tree, because for some reason that’s how I see it - with me huddled under a huge tree as seasons pass - but I know that when and if I ever got up, you’d find me quite changed. My hair would be long, knotted, riddled with leaves and whatever else blew by in those days, weeks, months, years. My nails, unattended for so long, would be curled and grotesque. Assuming I even had the energy to ever move again, I’d be emaciated from a lack of nourishment. How could I eat? How would I drink? I’d be a skeleton of myself, a shell of who I once was when I was the mother of two perfect, loving boys. A ghost.

I know now why this tale is so prevalent in the Southwest, which it is. La Llorona is more than just a culturally specific boogeyman, more than a ghost story told to children to keep them from misbehaving or walking near river edges after dark. For parents she represents the ever-present possibility of loss, of what we would become. It’s terrifying. I haven’t slept in years.

This post was written for Scribbit’s October Write-Away contest. The topic: Ghosts.

I made it. A little overwhelmed. We just did a freaky speed-dating-like exercise during the welcome. The first session is about to start. I’m online and even sitting next to on outlet. Key factor. Am wondering when my coffee/sugar will wear off since I’ve been up since 5:00.

I have to admit I kind of enjoyed my drive here. The first hour, not so much. But around 7:00am, when the sun started to come up, and I switched from Regina Spektor to No Doubt, I started feelin’ it. This is the farthest physical space I have ever had between me and the kids; it’s very strange.

Session One - Blogging Basics: I Blog Therefore I am . . . Finding your Blogging Mojo

I think the part I’m most interested in this session will be how the panelists’ blogs have changed over time. It seems that there is quite a spread of experience in this room, from women who have yet to start their blog, up to those like me, who have been “blogging for over 1 year.” So I’m interested in how to keep things fun and stay motivated, and how priorities and styles change in the cycles of blogging.

*I’ll edit this post throughout the session. Or maybe I’ll try to actually listen:)

*I think I”ll have to go in depth later. I’m taking copious notes and will do so this week. But I’m trying to process everything first, you know.

We’re on to Session Two now: 6 steps to Personalize, Polish & Promote your Blog, but lunch was a sort of a brief session as well.